Thursday, November 26, 2009

Disjointed Visions

A roundabout concrete porch
(in Hawaii)

A little girl in a sun dress
(on her birthday)

places plastic banana leaves
(around the railing)

she walks to the right
(arranging)

she walks to the left
(tacking)

again to the right
(wondering if that is most efficient)

a neighbor finds our front door ajar
(entering)

"Both cars were in the driveway and your computer was on."
(emailing)

Friday, November 20, 2009

Couplet Videos

Toddlers smoking log cigars
engage in Lego tomahawk wars.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Daily commute log

Directions from Carlsbad, CA to Midway Home Entertainment in San Diego, CA.

Woke up with a kink in my neck on the right side.

I started up my motorcycle and the engine wound up to a deafening roar, the throttle stuck open. The rear wheel chirped against the asphalt of the freeway and the whole bike lurched forward out from under me. I used all my strength to hand on to the hand grips and the motorcycle bounced upright on its rear wheel as I wrestled it under control.

Hoping this was to be the only hiccup on my maiden motorcycle commute to work, I checked my mirrors before pulling out of the emergency lane on the left side of the freeway.

I found that I ride much the same as I drive a car although in the freedom surrounding the motorcycle I was much more attuned to the traffic patterns I nestled into, picked apart, and carefully monitored and predicted, finally appreciating the joy of passing, always passing.

Along the road to work, I stopped in at Brent's, seeing as he was heading the same direction. His apartment looked like a Karaoke bar, and he was next to perform from underneath an old blanket sitting on a La-Z-boy recliner.

The Karaoke emcee rejected my song choice of "The Next Frieda In Town" as one that was too obscure, suggesting instead that Brent sing Elvis Costello's "The Only Flame In Town"

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Greatest Hits Countdown

Extreme show that counts down the top 10 most gruesome, hard-hitting crashes and impacts from popular sports.

Tonight's episode counts down most painful football tackles.

The #1 victim spot goes to Texas Tech place kicker Tony Rogers. In a 1995 game against Texas Longhorns, in a fake field goal play, Rogers is tackled by defensive end Tony Brackens.

Lost footage from the game surfaced after the Longhorns' 48-7 victory over Tech that showed various members of the Longhorns team repeatedly tackling and stampeding over the same place kicker, knocking off his helmet, shoulder pads and even his shoes amidst the chaos of both teams and marching bands scattering across the field.

Coincidentally, both Tonys wore #98.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Celebrity Rave Showdown

It's time for Tom Selleck and Lee Majors to battle it out on DJ Hero!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Grenades

(characters finding strangely-decorated grenades is a recurring theme in this show, however, none have yet exploded)

Steve and Mr. G stood at the head of a line of middle school children practicing a ritual of handing over and back a large handful of nickels.

Mr. G asked how long it took to set up the lighting in the room.

"It took Umby at least thirty minutes," Steve responded, noticing that the child walking away had just pocketed six or seven nickels in his back pocket - enough for a free haircut and style from Jesse.

It was then that he also spied something like a fruit on the linoleum floor.

Steve picked up the object and studied it. It looked like a pineapple grenade made by carefully sculpting several strawberry popsicles. "How serendipitous," he thought to himself, "that I have yet to view the 'Chowder - The Blast Raz' episode on Cartoon Network tomorrow."

Brad emerged out of a broom closet; he had to change clothes after falling into the pool. Mr. G commented on how the Native American headdresses were backwards.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Oops

I wandered around a rooftop, driving a Clefairy-mobile, until happening upon a Porsche 917 racing car.

This car was controllable via a button on the top pressed with the index finger.

I flicked my finger, sending the racecar hurtling off a ramp, over a neighboring rooftop and out of sight with a horrible-sounding crash.

At street-level, I found the site of the crash - a police press conference was being held and injured people were being attended to and carried out on gurneys.

I confessed to causing the crash after the press conference ended, and quietly apologized for my careless, thoughtless actions.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Secret Meeting

Don't pour your special ice water into my iced tea!

Look someone threw away two McDonalds deluxe hamburgers with tomato!