Rigged Poetry

There’s a bakery in downtown Cat Hollow that holds a poetry contest each year, sponsored by the chamber of commerce.

Suspiciously, the winner is always one of their longest-standing customers.

It’s no secret that the bakery is actually a dispensary.

Sunset On Sunset

Bouncing a rainbow super ball super high on the sidewalk, then chasing it down the steep street is interrupted by leaf blowers.

Pool Slumber Party

For two nights in a row we came home to find pool water tracked into the house, on the brown carpet near the sliding glass door leading out to the back porch.

We quietly and carefully searched each room but found no other traces of intruders.

On the third night, the sliding glass door was left open, and searching an upstairs bedroom revealed that the intruders had barricaded the door from the inside with mattresses, trapping themselves inside.

They turned out to te the next door neighbors kids.

Every Screw In My Tennis Racket Was Loose

so I tightened each one with my ratcheting socket screwdriver.

Also, I dislike whenever I type three ‘.’s and they are replaced by ‘…’; it’s annoying.

Chinese Wartime Proclimation

Some kinda purple skull laser beam enemy chase, then ambush to repel them.

Relocating homework to a different deck of the cruise ship.

Friends With Words

I invented a new word game, but struggled to find a suitable name for it, seeing as the best descriptive titles including ‘word’, or ‘letter’, were already taken by other games.

I invented a new word for the game, “Squiddle”, and adopted a smiling squid as the game’s mascot. It can write words with a quill and its own ink.

Tic-Tac-Toe Bunsen Burners

It’s been my job to keep them lit for 30 years.

Chinese Holiday

A new Beijing game show has contestants speeding between locations in go karts, then participating in 100-player trivia and Simon says eliminations.

Winners earn enough money to shop at nearby restaurants and novelty shops for 10 minutes before moving on to the next location.

Someone Else’s Captured Memories

A gap-toothed girl with wild red hair.

A birthday present of a view across a lake.

Prefixes

NAIWPOADBULN.

IWTTBWEAHTMWASAHPDMPTP.

“AWO,A,AAP,” HS, AHSPOTTS.

“WAP?” IA.

“IK.”

Elements & Motifs

Vegas.

Uncarpeted spiral staircase.

High five.

Out of order videogame.

Lost $1,000 bet.

Someone else did it too.

Loudspeaker congratulating graduates.

Suitcase contents strewn about.

Empty guard chairs.

In a hotel.

I Guess That’s $20 Gone

I put $20 into a Video Poker machine and started to play.

The display and console were very dim; I pressed buttons to hold and deal, then the screen went black.

I pressed a button for service and a technician appeared and said, “I guess that’s $20 gone!”

Super Mario Lemonade Stand

True to their continuing commercial hustle, Mario and Luigi open Lemonade Stands to earn precious Coins.

A Harry Potter collaboration event sees Golden Snitches as a restocking currency.

Harry Potter: Legacy Project

The beloved movie series is rereleased each passing year. The actors who have died and their dialog are digitally removed from their scenes.

Eventually the movies transform into contemplative art pieces of scenery and sets; spaces where magic once lived.

Pasta Banana Boat

Batteries not included.

Who Made The Eggs?

I just cooked them.

“Who made the coffee,” asked TC.

“I just brewed it,” I said.

Stop At TJs For A Bite

Accelerate. Turn right. Tuen right. Turn left into the parking garage. Grab a bite to eat from Trader Joe’s new biodegradable meal. Comes with a little dirt in the box you can plant immediately after you’re finished eating.

Coin Stack

Every coin in this stack is over 10 years old:

- a Lincoln wheat cent

- an Indian head cent

- a shield nickel

- 3-cent piece

Too bad someone knocked the stack onto the ground and deliberately scraped the faces across the concrete.

Art Team Espionage

I was anonymously tasked to gather gossip on the Art Department; a simple dead-drop of information on names and what others are saying about each individual.

I got as far as obtaining a notebook, entitling it, “sekrit”, and writing down one name and a line before shredding the evidence, information on their own office Slack bio:

Kutaro Aiman: “the efficient farmer farms a field once, then moves on.”